Alina Stefanescu

(from Stories to Read Aloud to Your Fetus)

You were totally not supposed to exist seeing as how the Bikers for Christ Chief said I was too young to have babies. He had a super-big, movie-style bike which I rode …

My wife and I can’t agree on which shade of gray to paint the dining room. She blames my Baptist childhood.

“It makes communication difficult.”

My heart is in the wrong place, but my head bows in contrition.

She prefers …